Below is my life/CGA update… that I know has been a LONG time coming!
When I signed up for CGA I did not anticipate the busy season of life this would be. I knew it was going to be hard with a lot of learning involved…. but I guess I didn’t actually know what to expect. This has been the hardest and busiest season of life for me, so far. It’s been full of growth, new realizations, tiredness and lots of frustration. I’ve also never been in a season where I feel like I don’t have time to respond to texts and phone calls until now. It has been a whirl wind and trying to figure out how to utilize time management has been a big challenge for me. It feels like I’m busy all day and then when I’m not busy I’m too exhausted to do anything. I have also wrestled with how to find rest in this season and let me tell ya.. that too has been a challenge!
At the start of CGA, I had the intentions of doing bi-weekly newsletters.. but as you can tell that didn’t happen. This is only my second update so far since I moved to Gainesville. Honestly, classes have been hard for me and they took a lot of energy out of me. When I would leave class each day, I would shut my brain off to all things CGA related. I know that’s not really the right method of how I should function but I think I was operating in survival mode a little bit. I was trying to preserve what ever energy I had because I knew I had to go to work 2 hours after class. My job at the boys and girls club also requires a lot of my energy and it can also be stressful. So the best method I could think of, on how I should cope with all the things I knew I needed to process was to just turn my brain off. Or as Ben Able (my CGA teacher) would say, “turn the light switch off.” I’ve learned a lot from this coping mechanism alone. I’ve learned that the things that come up in CGA that I need to process after class are good things that I don’t need to avoid out of fear that I won’t be equipped with enough energy. I’ve learned that the Lord isn’t pressuring me to check everything off of my to do list or even process by a specific time. He shows me grace and love and he’s patient with me, all I have to do is give him my time. I’ve learned that putting the expectation on class that it’s going to leave me being frustrated and exhausted is actually giving the enemy the authority to steal my joy and energy. Keeping your eyes on the Lord even during the harder times is what will help us stay steadfast in our faith. The Lord will always give you what you need in all circumstances and in every season. Walking in the authority the Lord has given me and not giving my authority to things that steal my joy and energy is something I’ve learned a lot about in CGA. I don’t have to give frustration or unmet expectations the authority to steal my good mood and pull me into having a bad attitude and hold onto bitterness. Instead I get to walk in the authority the Lord has given me and with that I get to choose to have hope, peace, joy and trust in the Lord, because that is our inheritance as His children.
Although this has been a hard and very busy season full of so many lessons, it has also been a really good season. I can truly see the Lord so much through CGA. He has given me many gifts like new friends, memories that I’ll never forget, new lessons learned, sweet community, growth and so much more! I’ve been able to learn new things about myself which has brought me more understand of who I am. My job at The Boys and Girls Club and the people I’ve met through working there has been a huge blessing too. There are so many gifts the Lord has given me in my time in CGA but this is just naming a few.
A little more about what we’ve done in class so far is we’ve read 5 books (the tale of three kings, daring greatly, 5 dysfunctions of a team, emotionally healthy spirituality and Keep your love on), done a couple of presentations, and learned on so many different topics like the cost of leadership, influence, how to work as a team, etc. It has been a jam packed semester with so much new information and perspectives. I know I’ll continue to learn about these topics as time goes on, as well as how to apply them to my every day life.